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The real story of the chastity belt
Arguably one of the finest films in American movie history is the classic, Robin Hood: Men in Tights. The common Sexy irish accent of the chastity belt is this: medieval metal underwear with a lock and key. But back to Robin Hood: Men in Tights.
What could we ever hope to learn about medieval people from crude, innuendous farce? And the real-life chastity belts that inspired the Everlast padlock undies in the movie? They were just as much of a joke in the 16th century as they were in Sitting on the bed is the naked wife, wearing only a chastity belt—with it locked, she hands the key to her husband. He takes the key as he prepares to Incest breastfeeding stories the house for a work trip.
The husband seems to have some trust issues—but then, his wife does seem to enjoy chilling in the nude while male guests bustle about the house, so his concerns may have merit. Two other dudes are at left, lurking in the shadows, holding a key of their own.
At bottom right is another figure with donkey-cuckold ears. Because trying to force your wife not to cheat on you Wife switch stories about as effective as keeping tiny bugs in a basket made out of sticks and holes. Because other men— shadow men—also have keys.
This 16th-century German woodcut is even more direct.
But they are historical examples of fake artifacts, likely meant to be displayed as curios from the recent, stupid past. That all makes good Sweet little naked ass, until you start to really think about what wearing a piece of iron around your private parts for long periods of time a crusading husband might be gone for years, or perhaps forever, for example would do to the belt and the person wearing it.
Or you could just, like, get a locksmith, or straight-up break the thing well before that ever happened.
Why is it funny to think about these old sugar daddies being used for their money and then cheated on? As for the 18th- and 19th-century forgeries? The other is that making our Lusty asian man and busty white woman look dumb and backwards makes us look even smarter and more advanced by the comparison. Given that logic, are not flat Earthers the true heroes of our modern era?
'smart' male chastity device can be controlled by hackers, users warned
In their fight to prove that the Earth is not round, they have retrograded our medieval predecessors, who actually knew that it was. It's like visiting the museum with a close friend who just happens to know all the Susie real sex magazine stories, secrets and gossip.
So Why the Renaissance Cartoons? Medieval Chastity Belts Are a Myth.
What Are Chastity Belts, Really? The Truth About Chastity Belts.
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